Snapshot of an Easter day: me in my room, preparing all the stuff for my trip, listening to music. First, the whole "The fat of the land" made me dance like no one, and now "Make yourself" by Incubus, one of the albums I like most. And I'm dreaming, about the past and the future. Lots of memories coming out of my wardrobe, while I'm taking out clothes. And from the music, too.
Damn, I love this music, I love my memories, I love my friends. Yes, I will really miss them! And I would like them to know it, because I couldn't even imagine my life without them. They've been very close to me in this hard moment of my life and I won't never be enough thankful for this. These are which I call Friends!

Never forget how much I've been loving you!

Oh God, I really feel bad today! Last night I went out with my ex-girlfriend, she's been my girlfriend for more than 8 years, and now the knowledge to be no more special for her has left me an emptiness I cannot fill with anything else.
So, last night we went out, we talked, she told me now I'm nothing more than a friend for her. In the end, when I took her back home, she touched my hand and kissed me, and I wanted that moment to never end, I was feeling in paradise, and when she got out of the car I fell in hell.
I don't know how many tears dropped down, I just know I ran home because I was feeling lost. Still now, while I'm writing these word, tears are signing my face. I can't find a reason for the situation I'm living. Why were we both crying while hugging? Why do we have to live such a way? Why do I still love her even if she's broken my heart?
Ok, ok. I have to live with this shit, so I'll try to. Now it's march 20th, 11 days left and I'll leave to Ireland, I really need to change lifestyle for a while. I hope to meet new friends, to do a good work there, and furthermore I hope to forget her, because now this is the best thing I can do for myself...

Damn, human being is strange... there's nothing like love: it can take you on top of the world but it's dangerous, because the higher you get, the lower you can fall. And if you fall down from a very high peak... it hurts a lot! But this means I am alive, if I couldn't feel these emotions I wouldn't be alive either.
Now I have to concentrate only on myself, it will be hard, but I have to do it!

Lots of thoughts run into my mind, lots of questions, doubts and just a few answers.
What will the future bring to me? In 4 weeks I'll be in a different land, with different people, alone. I can't wait anymore! Nevertheless I would not leave without solving my doubts first, because I know I'm doing the right thing for me, but I'm not sure I'm doing the right thing for all the people I care.
Well, I'll see... I hope future will clear this mess.